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For me it'd be....

!BREAKING NEWS!
Sir Alex Fergiescum has died of a very painful heart attack.....PARTY TIME!

I'll settle for a blowjob if anyone fancies coming round

not a lot. it's a pisser of day. a bottle of beaujolais is required. and a film, amybe some nfl (they take the clock seriously in that), i am not watching motd2. i have dignity. some, anyway.

Day? What about rest of the week?

I don't know. This is going to be some right shitty week. I'm sure Dazby has some happy-clappy shit in store to cheer me up though.

An announcement that u****d are going to be placed into administration as they can no longer repay the interest on their debts followed by news that fergiescum has had a heart attack followed by news that o'gay has given aids to the whole u****d squad

If the above were to happen I might, just might mind you, cheer up a little

Short of a fivesome with Girls Aloud (less the Scouse one), not a lot.

Roll on Wed, Fulham are going to suffer.

the swamp burned with all their fans and players and pisshead

paddyblue wrote:the swamp burned with all their fans and players and pisshead

Aye, I was just thinking of that pic that someone posted on here of Old Trafford in flames, that may raise a slight smile

Ferguson was caught dogging with a black man in a car park and was arrested.

But i'd only be average after that at best.

I will just settle with Bellers not getting charged

My flatmate to piss off.

He has been fucking going on tonight and i nearly lost it earlier.

frannylee wrote:An announcement that u****d are going to be placed into administration as they can no longer repay the interest on their debts followed by news that fergiescum has had a heart attack followed by news that o'gay has given aids to the whole u****d squadIf the above were to happen I might, just might mind you, cheer up a little

If there was any justice and Carlsberg did dreams that would be mine as well.

WHEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY THE BITTER BLUE CUNTS FOUND OUT. NOW PIPE DOWN YOU SMALL TIME TWATS.
OH CITEH ARE A MASSIVE CLUB!
FORVER IN OUR SHADOWS

btw, I have a ludicrously small penis.

Obviously it was your cup final son.

OWENNNN wrote:WHEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY THE BITTER BLUE CUNTS FOUND OUT. NOW PIPE DOWN YOU SMALL TIME TWATS.
OH CITEH ARE A MASSIVE CLUB!
FORVER IN OUR SHADOWS

Firstly we weren't in Manchester today.
2nd whats forver?
3rd Owen has only one N.
And 4th Fuck off knob.

I don’t want to piss on your parade here matey but that flag draped from the stand contains a serious grammatical and geographical error.

It should read “WELCOME TO TRAFFORD BOROUGH” you thick inbred cnut

Haha love it the bitters more bitter and deluded than ever.
You were outplayed and playing for a draw, and now with your best player craig bellamy likely to get a lengthy ban for that violent attack on the united fan.

I fear for you :(

OWENNNN wrote:Haha love it the bitters more bitter and deluded than ever.
You were outplayed and playing for a draw, and now with your best player craig bellamy likely to get a lengthy ban for that violent attack on the U***d fan.

I fear for you :(

By the way, we had well over £100 million worth of talent unavailable to us.

Let's see how you fare when you come to eastlands.

Must be great to know that you won by basically cheating - still it doesn't surprise me that you don't really care how you won as integrity is not a word that is understood or valued at u****d

However, it must be quite worrying for you when you know that qualifying for the champions league every year is not so much about pride as it is about ensuring your clubs survival. The day you fail to qualify for the champions league is the day that your beloved club starts its inexorable (unable to be prevented from continuing or progressing) slide into bankruptcy and I for one will rejoice when they start demolishing the swamp to build a ghetto to house the unloved, unlovable, unwashed and unsavoury (which is no real change from its current occupants)

So take the piss all you like for your day of reckoning* will surely come (*Sat 17th April - or earlier if cup draws are kind to us)

I didn`t know you had broadband in the ORKNEYS
please tell us your No1 goal scorer
No 1 appearances
here`s a clue....wiki you diki