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YOU KNOW YOU'RE CRAP WHEN...

PostPosted: Thu May 19, 2011 4:13 am
by john68
It is noticeable that as we cemented 4th spot, won the cup and iovertook Arsenal for 3rd, members have become far too p[olite to each other. Even Carl has become all marshmallow and cuddly...God forbid that we might beat Bolton and the anger totally disappear from here....Remember we are bitter...
Do you realise that having retired from the swamp, our chances to slag of Gary Chuckle 1 next season will be seriously diminished. So as a last chance to celebrate your thoughts on him and his career...

...YOU KNOW YOU'RE SHITE WHEN....

Your sister can grow better facial hair than you.
You are subbed in a derby and the opposing fans give you a standing ovation.
You feed the Goat and he scores.
Your Grand design house is inspired by the teletubbies.
As rough as you look, you can't even beat Luke Chadwick in the Ugliest Footballer comp.
You gloat that you have never ever lost to any type of City team...then promptly lose to a City team that same day.

Feel free to dig the knife in as often as you want.

Re: YOU KNOW YOU'RE CRAP WHEN...

PostPosted: Thu May 19, 2011 5:22 am
by john@staustell
.....You have to build your own clubhouse for Scum fans out of your own pocket to try and stay in the limelight and keep famous.


To be fair, in amongst the likes of Chadwick, Scholes, Shrek, Jimmy Hill-chin brother, Horse-face (and Tevez), at one time he must have been one of the most handsome on their team photo!

Re: YOU KNOW YOU'RE CRAP WHEN...

PostPosted: Thu May 19, 2011 6:26 am
by hyper
When...

1. ...you can't find a wooden spoon in your own kitchen (beginning of clip)
2. ...you think the house is going to burn down because there're strange blue flames coming out of your gas hob (2:10 in)

What a muppet.

[youtube]72aHqkhPu0U[/youtube]

Re: YOU KNOW YOU'RE CRAP WHEN...

PostPosted: Thu May 19, 2011 7:27 am
by Ted Hughes
You play 85 games for England & still fail to convince half the country that you should ever have played one.

Re: YOU KNOW YOU'RE CRAP WHEN...

PostPosted: Thu May 19, 2011 7:33 am
by Alioune DVToure
When your kid brother looks like the withered corpse of Mckenzie Crook and still pulls all the birds you're after.

I thought this was gonna be about our wilderness years. I was going to suggest 'getting a last minute winner at Macclesfield and partying like it's 1999.'

Re: YOU KNOW YOU'RE CRAP WHEN...

PostPosted: Thu May 19, 2011 7:42 am
by Slim
You and your brother both have threads started about you within a day of each other on a website that claims not to be obsessed with every fucking breath a rag cunt takes.

Re: YOU KNOW YOU'RE CRAP WHEN...

PostPosted: Thu May 19, 2011 7:47 am
by Dipstick
john@staustell wrote:To be fair, in amongst the likes of Chadwick, Scholes, Shrek, Jimmy Hill-chin brother, Horse-face (and Tevez), at one time he must have been one of the most handsome on their team photo!


Come on! Wio, Fletcher, and the potato heads (Sylvestre, Obertan) were the real lookers of the team.

Re: YOU KNOW YOU'RE CRAP WHEN...

PostPosted: Thu May 19, 2011 3:34 pm
by Twobob
Alioune DVToure wrote:When your kid brother looks like the withered corpse of Mckenzie Crook and still pulls all the birds you're after.
I thought this was gonna be about our wilderness years. I was going to suggest 'getting a last minute winner at Macclesfield and partying like it's 1999.'


And has had a more varied and experianced career than you, having played for more than ONE club manager.

Re: YOU KNOW YOU'RE CRAP WHEN...

PostPosted: Thu May 19, 2011 3:43 pm
by john68
Slim wrote:You and your brother both have threads started about you within a day of each other on a website that claims not to be obsessed with every fucking breath a rag cunt takes.


Just when i thought it was all too cuddly, you restore my faith...cheers Slim.

Re: YOU KNOW YOU'RE CRAP WHEN...

PostPosted: Thu May 19, 2011 4:01 pm
by Bridge'srightfoot
Ted Hughes wrote:You play 85 games for England & still fail to convince half the country that you should ever have played one.

He was an absolute C*nt, unfortunately he was a fking good player.

Re: YOU KNOW YOU'RE CRAP WHEN...

PostPosted: Thu May 19, 2011 4:15 pm
by Lee_R
When then most important thing in your life is banner with '35 years' on it.. and you have to take it down.

Re: YOU KNOW YOU'RE CRAP WHEN...

PostPosted: Thu May 19, 2011 5:00 pm
by Florida Blue
When you are not a Blue!

Re: YOU KNOW YOU'RE CRAP WHEN...

PostPosted: Thu May 19, 2011 5:57 pm
by ashton287
john@staustell wrote:.....You have to build your own clubhouse for Scum fans out of your own pocket to try and stay in the limelight and keep famous.



I dont think thats why he is doing it.

I personally think he is such a vile, ugly, nasty little shit the scum (the fucking original evil empire) are embarrassed to be associated with him and dont want him having anything to do with the club anymore so he has gone and done this to be involved. Like an ex girlfriend who rings you up and begs to get back with you and says you can keep sleeping with other girls if you take her back.

Re: YOU KNOW YOU'RE CRAP WHEN...

PostPosted: Thu May 19, 2011 10:33 pm
by Mikhail Chigorin
When the rats in the sewers are better looking and more appealing than you.

Hi John, you're certainly on top form with this thread; marvellous.

Re: YOU KNOW YOU'RE CRAP WHEN...

PostPosted: Fri May 20, 2011 4:01 am
by john68
Cherers young Mikhail, appreciated...:-)

Ashton, You may have a point there mate. Having failed with his teletubbie house, I wonder which CBeebies show will inspire this design?

Re: YOU KNOW YOU'RE CRAP WHEN...

PostPosted: Fri May 20, 2011 10:20 pm
by walmai
YOU KNOW YOU'RE CRAP WHEN...

Dave Whelan donates a room for you to get sacked in.

Re: YOU KNOW YOU'RE CRAP WHEN...

PostPosted: Fri May 20, 2011 10:30 pm
by gillie
walmai wrote:YOU KNOW YOU'RE CRAP WHEN...

Dave Whelan donates a room for you to get sacked in.

Yeah that was real classy stuff from the porn barons.

Re: YOU KNOW YOU'RE CRAP WHEN...

PostPosted: Fri May 20, 2011 10:48 pm
by Ted Hughes
gillie wrote:
walmai wrote:YOU KNOW YOU'RE CRAP WHEN...

Dave Whelan donates a room for you to get sacked in.

Yeah that was real classy stuff from the porn barons.


And what a strange & sinister little pair of porn barons they are. Creepy creepy creepy.

Re: YOU KNOW YOU'RE CRAP WHEN...

PostPosted: Sat May 21, 2011 7:03 am
by walmai
Ted Hughes wrote:
gillie wrote:
walmai wrote:YOU KNOW YOU'RE CRAP WHEN...

Dave Whelan donates a room for you to get sacked in.

Yeah that was real classy stuff from the porn barons.


And what a strange & sinister little pair of porn barons they are. Creepy creepy creepy.


The manner by which they made their money is one thing.

A second thing is their utter incompetence in running our football club.

I fear we may be away for quite some time.

Enjoy the sunshine, lads, I shall be following your Euro tour with interest.

Re: YOU KNOW YOU'RE CRAP WHEN...

PostPosted: Sat May 21, 2011 7:10 am
by Niall Quinns Discopants
walmai wrote:
Ted Hughes wrote:
gillie wrote:
walmai wrote:YOU KNOW YOU'RE CRAP WHEN...

Dave Whelan donates a room for you to get sacked in.

Yeah that was real classy stuff from the porn barons.


And what a strange & sinister little pair of porn barons they are. Creepy creepy creepy.


The manner by which they made their money is one thing.

A second thing is their utter incompetence in running our football club.

I fear we may be away for quite some time.

Enjoy the sunshine, lads, I shall be following your Euro tour with interest.


Bollocks.

You'll bounce back in year or two. Too big of a club for Championship and your excellent youth production will always make sure you got talent coming through.

You need to cut those high earning softies from your ranks though. It's shocking that likes of Dyer and Boa Morte are still in your books.