amusing chants /songs

[rosbif cuisson 'bleu']

was looking at the bollox on tues/wed? (ty chinners) and watched the clip of city v liverpool (late 70s), and it reminded me of a match during the same era when there was a flu epidemic. There was a seat empty behind the N.stand goal, NO HELEN! The chant went up,
"Helen Helen ring your bell"
followed by
"Helen where are you?"
followed by
"Part-time supporter"

I also read about fans singing "come and have a go if you think you're hard enough", when Ricky Hatton was taking his seat,

do the lads remember any other classy chants/ songs? Or have any of you that know how to work the interweb thingy got any clips?

[Dronny]

Remember watching City vs Dirty Leeds in the early 70's and there was another particularly cynical foul by Giles, the chant went up of "dirty northern bastards" without a hint of irony.

[simon12]

From Saturday (so recent) in 110/11

Ooooh Micah Richards
He`s a fullback
And he`s a blue
He looks like Balottelli
But he doesn`t wear a hat
He doesn`t play for Englandos capello is a twat

[frozen_pea]

"We all live in a Robbie Fowler house!" to the tune of Yellow Submarine as he owned a lot of properties in Greater Manchester.
Singing "Happy Birthday" to Robbie Fowler when he was waiting to take a corner.

Are two that stick in my mind.

As a child I always found the Ryan Giggs one funny and sung it on the primary school playground.

[Goataldo]

We've got that Terry Phelan,
Whoa that Terry Phelan,
We've got that Terry Phelan,
And he's fast, fast, fast, whoawhoaaaa...

To the tune of You've lost that lovin' feeling.

[hyper]

Now sung by Spurs fans...

Adebayor, Adebayor, his dads an accountant, and his mum studies law.

[Chinners]

Oh David White
He's fucking fast ...

[Evenmydoghatesunited]

Heaven knows what year it was when I sang this on the Kippax but given that it was to the popular (at that time) tune "in our Liverpool Home" by The Scaffold (of Lily the Pink fame) it dates it to early 70s - altogether now:

"oh they look in a dustbin for something to eat, they find a dead cat and they think that's a treat, in their Liverpool slums, oh in their Liverpool slums......etc".

Well you get the idea. Not quite Bob Dylan is it but it amused your correspondent's prepubescent sense of humour.

[Lev Bronstein]

At home to Leeds during the dark days of the late 90s, they started singing "Going down, going down, going down". We replied to the same tune "so are we, so are we, so are we"

[Goataldo]

Heaven knows what year it was when I sang this on the Kippax but given that it was to the popular (at that time) tune "in our Liverpool Home" by The Scaffold (of Lily the Pink fame) it dates it to early 70s - altogether now:

"oh they look in a dustbin for something to eat, they find a dead cat and they think that's a treat, in their Liverpool slums, oh in their Liverpool slums......etc".

Well you get the idea. Not quite Bob Dylan is it but it amused your correspondent's prepubescent sense of humour.

And the second verse:

Your mum's on the game and your dad's in the nick,
You can't get a job cos you're too fuckin thick,
In your Liverpool slums

[Chinners]

'Alan Ball's a football genius' sung whilst Liverpool scored their sixth against us still makes me smile.

Not so much a song but during the banana phase we were away to Brenford in the FA Cup (we lost 3-1) but before the teams came out we were all chanting/waving the bananas and other assorted inflatables when a section of our fans started going 'ooooooooh frankie frankie .... frankie frankie frankie frankie Frankenstien' and then proceed to smash fuck out of the inflatable monster with their bananas ... I missed the first goal because I was still laughing ... I think Justin Fashuna played for us that day come to think of it.

[Ted Hughes]

Anyone remember after it was reported in the press that Stan Bowles' wife had left him, the Kippax singing; " Stanley, Stanley where's your wife ? " & he turned round with his arms out & shrugged his shoulders ?

[Yffi_88]

Sang by villa with their good old brummy accents... Bit harsh but had to laugh...

Hit by a bus, hit by a buuuuus,
Jolson Lescott
Got hit by a bus.

A few smiles where we were sat for that. Similarly to for...

Shits on messi, shits on messiiiii
JOLEON LESCOTT
He shits on messi.

Good old Joleen. Nearly got a slap on Saturday for telling a local barmaid she looked like him!

[Beeks]

I find it hard to believe we sang it back in the day

'Who's that dying on the runway' was very popular in the 80s

I cringe about it now but 10 out of 10 for inventiveness

[Evenmydoghatesunited]

C'mon Arsenal give us 5 - as we went down to 4-0 at home after 20 mins

[Piccsnumberoneblue]

As a raft of Valencia subs did some co-ordinated warming up during a Thomas Cook Trophy pre season game. . . . .
You put your left leg in ...etc etc I'm fairly certain they wondered what the fuck was going on.

on a similar theme
We've won it three times
We've won it three times
the Thomas cook Trophy
We've won it three times.

And who remembers when Peter Shilton had been caught with some bint called Tina
To the tune of the Salford Jets hit of the day.....
He's had Tina,
in his Cortina

[Evenmydoghatesunited]

I admit I read about this but still made me laugh. I think the facts were this was the year we went down to the 3rd division (or whatever it was called) so I suppose it would be 98. We were away against Palace and losing 3-0 when we scored and the City fans started chanting "we're going to win the league"

The Palace fans started jeering and apparently a City fan shouted out "it's called irony you stupid cockney twat".

Priceless. One of the reasons why I love City so much.

[blues-clues]

When I used to stand on the Kippax in the late 70s if one of the opposition was injured I am sure that our of genuine concern and sympathy we used to sing

"let im die, let im die, let im die"

or

We hope your balls drop off
We hope your balls drop off
We hope your balls,
We hope your balls drop off

Certainly remember the "Liverpool slums" song.

[Mase]

Sang by villa with their good old brummy accents... Bit harsh but had to laugh...

Hit by a bus, hit by a buuuuus,
Jolson Lescott
Got hit by a bus.

When did he get hit by a bus? Was it after he was dragged by that car causing the scar on his face or before?

Thick brummy twats!

[Mase]

We never win at home and we never win away.
We lost last week and we lost today.
We don't give a fuck cause we're all pissed up.
M.C.F.C OK