Thursday's B*ll*x

[Chinners]

SANCHEZ CLUB TRANSFER BOLLOX OF THE DAY - Part 4 Barcelona
Sanchez talks underway confirm Barca
Barcelona vice-president Josep Maria Bartomeu has confirmed the club have started negotiations with Udinese for Chile forward Alexis Sanchez.
The Spanish and European champions have been linked with the 22-year-old winger for some time and Bartomeu is hopeful a deal will be reached.
"We are optimistic, but this has just begun. We are negotiating for Sanchez," he told Chilean newspaper La Tercera.
"We know he is a valuable player; that is why there are so many teams after him. We have to continue talking and we will see what is going to happen in the next few days."
Sanchez, who is also a reported target for Inter Milan, Manchester City and Manchester United, is thought to prefer a move to the Nou Camp.
But Bartomeu insists the player's club hold the key to his arrival in Barcelona.
"We will first have to come to an agreement with Udinese," he said.

SANCHEZ SUMMARY TO DATE BOLLOX
Udinese have confirmed that all five clubs interested in Alexis Sanchez have made offers.
European champions Barcelona, Manchester duo City and United, Inter Milan and Juventus have all made their moves.
City had been leading the charge for the brilliant young Chilean and their bid is reported to be the best in terms of finances for Udinese - but the player will have the final decision.
United have entered the bidding at the final stages, with Sir Alex Ferguson seemingly unwilling not to try and land a player he has admired for the best part of a decade.
Juventus are keen to make a marquee signing ahead of the opening of their new stadium - but reports on the continent suggest it is Barca and Inter who are now leading the chase.
Udinese's transfer consultant Stefano Antonelli, who helps oversee all their major deals, confirmed to Sky Italia that they were now looking at their options.
"There are five clubs who are doing everything to get hold of him: Barcelona, Manchester City, United and two Italian clubs," Antonelli revealed.
"The offers have all come from these clubs. We don't want to create a bidding war, but he is the big name on the transfer market at the moment and everyone wants him.
"Over the next few days we should learn where Sanchez will go. We wanted to keep hold of the player, but when there is an important offer, it should be evaluated fully."
Antonelli admitted he did not know where Sanchez would go, but he feels Barcelona would be the logical favourites.
"All the clubs we talked about have a chance of signing him, but right now my feeling is that he's more likely to go abroad," he said.
"Barcelona's very powerful push on to the scene has changed the scenario somewhat."
Barcelona vice-president Josep Maria Bartomeu is hopeful a deal will be reached.
"We are optimistic, but this has just begun. We are negotiating for Sanchez," he told Chilean newspaper La Tercera.
"We know he is a valuable player; that is why there are so many teams after him. We have to continue talking and we will see what is going to happen in the next few days."


JOSE MOURINHO: EDIN DZEKO'S THE REAL DEAL
Jose Mourinho was hot on Edin Dzeko’s trail in January and was devastated when the 25-year-old Bosnian opted for Eastlands.
Roberto Mancini splashed out £27m – a Bundesliga record fee – to sign him from German club Wolfsburg.
Dzeko went on to score six goals but only two in the Premier League in 21 games as City qualified for the Champions League and won the FA Cup.
He still has four years of his City contract to run but Mancini could be tempted to cash in as he pursues other transfer targets.
City are leading the way in the race to sign Udinese’s Chilean international Udinese winger Alexis Sanchez, who will cost at least £30m.
And they are also weighing up a move for another Serie A striker, Ezequiel Lazvezzi of Naples, while former Arsenal star Emmanuel Adebayor is on his way out of the club.
Ironically, Mourinho turned to Adebayor on loan when he was pipped by Mancini in the race to sign Dzeko in the January transfer window.
Mourinho rejected the chance to make the move permanent, with Blackburn now after the City man.
Instead he has made the capture of Dzeko his top priority.

Blackburn going for Adebayor in £30m spree
Blackburn manager Steve Kean is targeting Emmanuel Adebayor as he jets home from India today armed with a £30million warchest.
Kean has spent the last five days discussing his summer spending plans with owners Venky's and they have approved all the names on his hit-list.
Kean's top priority is signing a big-name striker and Adebayor tops the list, along with Roma's Mirko Vucinic and Amauri of Juventus.
Manchester City are desperate to offload Adebayor, just two years after splashing out £25million to sign him from Arsenal.
Real Madrid failed to exercise the option to make his loan spell permanent before Monday's deadline.
City may now accept as little as £10m for Adebayor, with manager Roberto Mancini adamant he does not want the player back at their Carrington base for pre-season training.
He would be a cheaper option than Vucinic as Roma are demanding £16million for the Montenegro international, who is also a target for Juventus.
Kean intends to be busy this summer and is also eyeing up Aston Villa's James Collins and Birmingham's Roger Johnson to replace Manchester United new boy Phil Jones.
Rovers have also tried to hijack Miranda's free-agent switch from Brazilian champions Sao Paulo to Atletico Madrid by offering to double his wages, but the Brazilian defender is expected to honour his pre-contract agreement with the Spanish outfit.
Another option is Diego Novaretti, an Argentine defender playing for Mexican side Toluca who has been offered to Blackburn.
Blackburn are also vying with Sunderland to sign Sebastian Larsson, the Swedish winger who is a free agent after seeing out his contract with Birmingham.

Chelsea and Man City still in Aguero hunt as Juventus deal denied
Chelsea and Manchester City remain in the hunt for Sergio Aguero after his agent scotched reports that the striker has agreed to join Juventus.
Reports in Italy had claimed that the Serie A side had all but sealed a £40m deal for the Atletico Madrid star, after his representatives met with Juve officials in Turin.
The news would have ruled out a move to the Premier League for the Argentina international, who has been a long-term target for the two English sides.
But Hernan Reguera, who represents the 23-year-old, has insisted that no such meeting has taken place and that his client's future is still undecided.
"Sergio has two agents and we have both been in Argentina, we have not met anyone," Reguera told Spanish newspaper AS.
"We have not been in Italy or anywhere, we are in Argentina working on his future. He is quiet, he has delegated this to us and is now focused on the Copa America."

Vieira weighs up his next move after City career comes to an end

Frenchman has not been offered a new playing deal but he could take up offers in the US, Qatar or Europe
Patrick Vieira is due to have further discussions with Manchester City, who have effectively made him a free agent by not including him on their retained list of players
Patrick Vieira has decided that his Manchester City career is over, a conclusion which ends the British career of one of the Premier League's most outstanding midfielders.
Vieira is due to have further discussions with City, who have effectively made him a free agent by not including him on their retained list of players, and Roberto Mancini may offer him a coaching role, in recognition of the way that the club's expensively assembled squad looks up to him. But the 34-year-old does not feel he is yet ready to move into that side of the game. Offers have come in from the United States and Qatar and a European move is also possible, though he is yet to decide where to move next.
The three-times Premier League title-winner had hoped that a key role in the FA Cup final might see him into a new deal, though his appearance a minute from time against Stoke City at Wembley summed up the frustrations he felt about his lack of game time last season. The 2010-11 campaign was the first of his entire 17-year career in which Vieira was fully fit and yet unable to command regular, top-flight football. There were just four Premier League starts, despite him reaching his best physical condition for years.
The midfielder's last meaningful contribution for City was as a substitute in the home win over Tottenham, a 25-minute period which was arguably his best since he arrived from Internazionale in January last year. But his undoubted value in shoring up City's midfield that evening only compounded the sense that his value to the club has not been appreciated. "When you have a level that is not what is desired, then it is perhaps better to decide to stop," Vieira said earlier this month. At that stage, he claimed he was undecided. "I'm thinking. Either I go to Manchester City, or I do something else. It's 50-50," he declared.
He would be valued in Major League Soccer, where his former Arsenal teammate Thierry Henry has already moved, and certainly in Qatar, and though he has said a move to France is "probably not" for him and that he "can't see" himself with a mid-table English team, Vieira may not be quite ready to give up the European game just yet. He arrived at City with a point to prove, as several of his former Arsenal team-mates suggested a move back to the Premier League might be beyond him, and, after an initial struggle with the calf injury sustained just before his move, he proved valuable enough to secure a 12-month extension on his initial six-month contract.
He did suffer against sides with greater tempo, though, and had largely to content himself with roles in the FA Cup run. Possibly his most valuable role for Mancini has been in shepherding Mario Balotelli – who followed him from Inter – through a difficult first season. Currently in Paris, Vieira is as immersed in off-field activities as ever. He and his Trinidadian wife, Cherie, have heavy charitable commitments.
Though his second Premier League spell did not allow him to haunt Manchester United as he hoped, he can be content that since Arsenal's first Double in 1997-98, he won at least one major trophy every year, with club or country – with the solitary exception of 1999. His last kick for Arsenal was the winning penalty against United in the 2005 FA Cup final and his last contribution for City sealed a trophy after 35 years of waiting. It means that he signs off with symmetry, if not total satisfaction.

WAG OF THE DAY


OTHER BOLLOX
Arsenal are preparing an audacious bid to take striker Jermain Defoe from London rivals Tottenham. Daily Mirror

Tottenham have rejected a £22m bid from Chelsea for Croat midfielder Luka Modric. Sky Sports

Liverpool duo Maxi Rodriguez and Raul Meireles could be on their way out of Anfield. the Sun

Manchester United boss Sir Alex Ferguson is ready to make a surprise £12m offer for Blackpool midfielder Charlie Adam. Daily Star

Arsenal duo Cesc Fabregas and Samir Nasri have handed the club a double boost by signalling they are both happy to stay at the Emirates. Metro

But Nasri has demanded a new contract worth £6m a year, which would make him the highest paid player at the club.
Full story: Daily Star

And Fabregas has said his future at Arsenal is not certain and that a move to Barcelona "guarantees titles". the Guardian

Chelsea are keen on Barcelona midfielder Thiago Alcantara but the 20-year-old's future could depend on whether the Spanish side sign Fabregas. Daily Mail

Inter Milan's Dutch midfielder Wesley Sneijder will be allowed to leave to join Manchester United for a fee of about £35m.Daily Star

Newcastle manager Alan Pardew hopes to sign West Ham striker Demba Ba and St Etienne midfielder Blaise Matuidi. Daily Mail

Inter Milan have started the bidding for Real Madrid's Brazilian forward Kaka, 29, at £26m. talkSPORT

Manchester United have made an offer for Lens defender Raphael Varane, who is also wanted by Manchester City and Arsenal. (The Times)

Tottenham have been told to pay £18m if they want to secure the services of midfielder Lassana Diarra from Real Madrid. Metro

But Spurs boss Harry Redknapp looks to be closing in on the signing of West Ham midfielder Scott Parker. Talks between the club and player over a £4m move began on Wednesday. (The Times)

Real Madrid have claimed that they are in talks with Liverpool about Argentine midfielder Fernando Gago. Daily Star

Real Madrid are at loggerheads with Chelsea over the battle for Santos's talented Brazilian forward Neymar, 19. Footy Bunker

Liverpool are hoping to cash in on the turmoil at Newcastle by bidding £22m for left-back Jose Enrique and midfielder Jonas Gutierrez. Caught Offside

Swansea have won the race to sign 19-year-old Tottenham defender Steven Caulker on loan next for season. talkSHIT

Arsenal are interested in Sunderland goalkeeper Craig Gordon, while Bologna have offered them stopper Emiliano Viviano. (The Times)

Blackburn midfielder Morten Gamst Pedersen is wanted by Turkish side Galatasary. (the Sun)

Roma's Brazilian goalkeeper Doni has rejected a move to Liverpool because the Reds offered him less than he is currently on. talkSHIT

Blackburn Rovers are keen on Aston Villa defender James Collins as a replacement for Arsenal-bound Christopher Samba. (The Times)

Liverpool are planning a £9m bid for Sao Paulo attacking midfielder Lucas. the Sun

Leeds boss Simon Grayson wants to bring Newcastle striker Alan Smith and Tottenham defender Jonathan Woodgate back to Elland Road. Daily Star

Espanyol midfielder Javier Marquez is wanted by Tottenham, Fulham and Blackburn. (the Sun).

Stoke boss Tony Pulis is ready to make a £10m bid for Sunderland striker Asamoah Gyan. Daily Mirror

Swansea are in the race to sign Poland Under-21 goalkeeper Greg Sandomierski from Jagiellonia Bialystok. Sandomierski is also wanted by Chelsea. the Sun

And the newly promoted Premier League club have made a bid for France and Panathinaikos striker Sidney Govou. Daily Mirror

Norwich are set to complete the loan signing of Manchester United defender Ritchie De Laet. (The Times)

Aston Villa turned down the chance to install former Valencia, Benfica and Atletico Madrid coach Sanchez Flores as their new manager after Gerard Houllier left the club. Daily Mirror

AFC Wimbledon have been stunned with the news that captain Danny Kedwell has handed in a transfer request at the newly promoted League Two club. talkSHIT

Newcastle midfielder Joey Barton fears the tension between the club's board and dressing room could result in other players leaving St James' Park, following Kevin Nolan's departure to West Ham. (The Times)

Salomon Kalou says Chelsea failed to win the Premier League last season because too many players sulked if they did not get into the team. the Sun


More b*ll*x later ....

[Goaters 103]

I can really see Adebayor going for a move to Ewood Park, he'd love it there! Not.

Amazing that Sanchez prefers a move to The Nou Camp. I thought the Sun and Mirror guaranteed yesterday that he was known to "prefer a move to Man U" or in fact was that fabricated bollox.

Im sure Barca will be adopting their usual transfer policy, ie bidding about £10m below the going rate, pleading poverty and that "its all we can afford" and "the price is not fair" etc etc.

If Barca are genuinely in for this guy, its time to look elsewhere and accept the bleeding obvious. Anybody in their right mind would choose Barca over all others in the current football world.

[bobby brows]

As any neurologist – apart from an actual one – will tell you, Arsène Wenger suffers from Jeffers-Almunia-Squillaci syndrome, meaning he is unable to learn from his mistakes. Another nasty symptom of JAS syndrome is the inability to learn from others' mistakes. Which means that after Alex McLeish sparked civil war in Birmingham by threatening to join Aston Villa, Wenger will do the same in north London by attempting to snatch Jermain Defoe from the clutches of Tottenham. Expect Armageddon to kick off around 2pm tomorrow just outside Finsbury Park tube when a Spurs fan wanders into an Arsenal pub and says "Actually, he's not that good any more, you can have him" and everyone buys him a drink.

If Spurs do get rid of Defoe, they'll snap up either Emmanuel Adebayor or Didier Drogba. Actually, that will start another inter-London war. Don't go to London for a few days. Meanwhile, as this very news organisation reports, Spurs have turned down a £22m bid for Luka Modric from Chelsea. The Mirror reckons they are lining up a replacement, though, and have had a bid for Werder Bremen's Marko Marin rejected. Oh, and Real Madrid have told Harry Redknapp Lassana Diarra will cost £18m.

Birmingham City continue to stumble through a post-zombie-apocalyptic wasteland while hordes of the undead surround them, ready to tear into their juiciest bits. CRUNCH! Liverpool are gorging on Scott Dann for £8m. UNGH! Blackburn have just torn off a hunk of Roger Johnson for £7m! GRAAAWK! Sunderland and Newcastle are bathed in £8m's worth of Craig Gardner! GNAAAR! Arsenal are thinking of signing Sebastian Larsson! Hang on, he's a free agent that doesn't really work! Still, Sebastian Larsson? Really?

Talking of players with plenty of flesh for zombies to feast on, if Charlie Adam does make it to Liverpool, Kenny Dalglish will let Raul Meireles go to Internazionale. To play. Not just for a stadium tour or anything.

Another man on his way to Europe is Blackburn's Steve Kean. According to the Mirror he's on his way to Spain with a "£30m war chest" to sign Emmanuel Adebayor from Real and any other "big-name strikers" that get in his way. The bad news is that a war chest containing £30m is going to weigh loads, particularly if – as the Mill likes to imagine – it's full of pirate treasure, which means Kean is going to be over his EasyJet baggage limit and he's looking at a £47 surcharge. That'll only leave him change to sign James Collins from Aston Villa.

If Stoke had £1 for every time they were linked with a £10m move for Asamoah Gyan they'd have £1. Actually, they'd have £2 now because we just repeated the rumour. The Mill's not sure what happens if this article is shared on Twitter or Facebook, they may only get 50p for each one of those.

Good news Match of the Day fans (sic). Alan Shearer says he still wants to manage, despite failing to agree terms to take over at Cardiff City. We do, however, have exclusive access to his half-time team talk and analysis at his hypothetical new club: "We're 1-0 down. The big lad on the other side has seen the ball come over and headed it and it has gone in. Gary Lineker didn't score many from outside the area and Alan Hansen is bad at golf!"

The Sun says Frank Lampard and the one off breakfast TV who isn't Adrian Chiles are engaged.

And finally, France winger Sidney Govou could be on his way to Swansea; Real are mulling over a £20m bid for Edin Dzeko; slighty alcoholic water product Budweiser will be the new FA Cup sponsors; and Barcelona have joined just about every other club in the world in the race to sign Paul Konc ... Alexis Sánchez.

[ashton287]

Another man on his way to Europe is Blackburn's Steve Kean. According to the Mirror he's on his way to Spain with a "£30m war chest" to sign Emmanuel Adebayor from Real

Hmmmmmmmm...................

[Ted Hughes]

How many chickens will have to die to pay for Adebayor ?

It's shocking.

[Avalon]

If Stoke had £1 for every time they were linked with a £10m move for Asamoah Gyan they'd have £1. Actually, they'd have £2 now because we just repeated the rumour. The Mill's not sure what happens if this article is shared on Twitter or Facebook, they may only get 50p for each one of those.

I laughed XD

[Hazy2]

Ade to Spurs plus 10mill we get Bale. Kolarov to Inter we get Eto, SWP, Bridge to Wolves we get Doyle.

[DoomMerchant]

How many chickens will have to die to pay for Adebayor ?

It's shocking.

that was legit funny. nicely played.

cheers

[gaudy]

How many chickens will have to die to pay for Adebayor ?

It's shocking.

ha ha,well in sir

[Dronny]

United have entered the bidding at the final stages, with Sir Alex Ferguson seemingly unwilling not to try and land a player he has admired for the best part of a decade.

Since he was 12??? Must have been hanging aroung with Arsene too much......................allegedly