Monday's B*ll*x

[Chinners]

THE BOLLOX

[youtube]C23hJ7rDW50[/youtube]

Monte Carlos: Principality side keen to make Tevez their marquee signing this summer
The Monegasque club are backed by Russian billionaire Dmitry Rybolovlev and wants to announce their return to the top flight with a big name deal
AS Monaco will look to Carlos Tevez this summer in a bid to propel them up the Ligue Un table.
Claudio Ranieri's side are currently top of Ligue Deux with eight games to go, and it would take a remarkable collapse for Les Rouge et Blanc to miss out on promotion back to the top flight.
Heavily-backed by Russian billionaire Dmitry Rybolovlev, Monaco have spent over £30million since being relegated in 2011 including the big-money signings of Club Brugge's Nabil Dirar and Manchester City target Lucas Ocampos.
Rybolovlev is one of the world's richest men, and made his fortune at fertiliser giant Uralkali alongside Anzhi Makhachkala owner Suleiman Kerimov.
With a Ligue Un return almost confirmed, thoughts have turned to next season and the club see Carlos Tevez as the perfect signing to announce their arrival back on the big stage, with ambitions of a finish in the European places.
Manchester City are planning something of a makeover this summer, with Edin Dzeko and Tevez both expected to leave the club and Gonzalo Higuaín, Robert Lewandowski, Edinson Cavani and Falcao all rumoured targets.
A £15million deal would appeal to both parties, with Tevez still capable of performing at the top level - as proven by his FA Cup hat-trick this weekend - and the Etihad club happy to recoup some of their outlay on the forward who turns 30 next year

Manchester City are still chasing Al-Ain midfielder Omar Abdulrahman, 21, according to the club's academy chief Brian Marwood. Sport 360

Vincent Kompany lined up as Carles Puyol replacement at Barcelona
Barcelona are contemplating a summer move for Manchester City captain Vincent Kompany, as they look to find a replacement for veteran defender Carles Puyol.
The Catalan’s skipper will be 35 next month, and with midfielder Javier Mascherano often deployed as a make-shift centre-back, Barca know they will need to make a top-class defensive signing a priority come the summer.
Kompany is reportedly high on their list of targets, along with Borussia Dortmund’s Mats Hummels and David Luiz of Chelsea.
The Sunday People report City’s sporting director Txiki Begiristain has already been approached by his former club over Kompany, 26, who is valued at around £20million by the current Premier League champions.
The Belgian only penned a new six-year deal last summer, but should the Spanish giants come calling at the end of the season, it’s believed Kompany could well be tempted to quit the side he joined back in 2008.
MCF.net THREAD: viewtopic.php?f=119&t=45374

Man City eye £8m Byram
MANCHESTER CITY plan a swoop for Leeds’ Sam Byram.
City boss Roberto Mancini has lined up an £8million summer bid for the 19-year-old whizkid.
Right-back Byram impressed Mancini in Leeds’ 4-0 FA Cup defeat at the Etihad.
Byram signed a new three-year deal two months ago but Mancini needs a long-term successor for Argentine Pablo Zabaleta.

City target Valencia boss to replace Mancini
MANCHESTER CITY’S failure to find a big-name coach to succeed Roberto Mancini could see them appoint a man few of their fans will have even heard of. Ernesto Valverde, 49, is so low-profile he could walk into the City souvenir shop unrecognised.
Both Pep Guardiola and Manuel Pellegrini have rejected approaches from the club’s new executive team, with Borussia Dortmund’s Jürgen Klopp expected to follow suit. Though Jose Mourinho would like a Premier League job, his relationship with the City chief executive, Ferran Soriano, and the director of football, Txiki Begiristain, is such that an appointment is unlikely. Instead, the Spanish duo are examining alternative options and their compatriot Valverde is prominent among those after a successful spell with Valencia.

Samir Nasri ready for a fight
SAMIR NASRI is determined to fight for his future at Manchester City after being criticised by manager Roberto Mancini.
The 25-year-old Frenchman has started only half City’s Premier League games this season but his agent Jean-Pierre Bernes says Nasri wants to stay.
Bernes said: “Sami’s value has not vanished.”

[spoiler][/spoiler]

Bayern Munich are ready to test Manchester United's willingness to hold onto striker Wayne Rooney, 27. DSSC

Arsenal boss Arsene Wenger is set to renew his efforts to sign 21-year-old Celtic defensive player Victor Wanyama. Daily Star

Manchester United are weighing up a move for Real Madrid's Luka Modric, 27, who is thought to be receptive to the idea of a switch to Old Trafford. Metro

Southampton striker Billy Sharp, 27, will join Nottingham Forest in a £1.2m deal this summer. Daily Mirror

Bobby Charlton has insisted Wayne Rooney remains a "great player" and will stay at Manchester United next season. DSSC

Danny Murphy, 35, wants to cancel his playing contract with Blackburn to take a coaching role with Fulham. Daily Mirror

Wigan chairman Dave Whelan will lead his side out of the tunnel at Wembley in his dream FA Cup semi-final. Sun

Bayern Munich president Uli Hoeness says the team will continue to hold public training sessions when ex-Barcelona boss Pep Guardiola arrives as coach next season. He said: "At Bayern we have a tradition that fans can see their idols up close and it is not going to change." El Mundo

Olympiakos won their 40th Greek league title with a 3-0 win over AEK Athens on Sunday. Ethnos

Borussia Dortmund defender Mats Hummels suffered an ankle injury at the weekend that will keep him out of action for four weeks, meaning he is likely to miss Germany's two World Cup qualifiers later this month. Bild

Loris Benito gets bitten for his troubles as he tackles a trespassing marten in Switzerland
A sharp-toothed marten caused havoc at a Swiss top division match between Thun and FC Zurich on Sunday.
Defender Loris Benito had his finger bitten as he tried to get it off the pitch before his Zurich team-mate Davide Da Costa finally carried it off the field.

The only consolation for Benito was that his side won the match 4-0. Fox News

MORE SOON ...

[City64]

Tits are bang on !

[Ted Hughes]

I would have thought that a player being attacked by a Martian would have caused more of a stir.


Little snippet there:

Manchester City are still chasing Al-Ain midfielder Omar Abdulrahman, 21, according to the club's academy chief Brian Marwood.

I really, & I mean REALLY hope this is true.

I have followed this lad since the olympics.

I don't know if he can learn to survive in the mugger's alley of the Prem, or whether he has the workrate or the bottle to get in City's team. That we can only find out over time. What I do know however, is that he has absolute talent bordering on genius & imo COULD become much much better than Silva for example. I haven't seen anything from Neymar which tells me he is automatically a better player than Abdulrahman & the difference in price between each gamble would be astronomical.

His attitude seems perfect from what I have seen, but the Prem is different & only a certain type of person can play in it. He would need to learn which passes he can make without players intercepting, how much stronger & quicker he has to be on the ball, the keepers will save stuff they let in back home, he will have to run twice as much, all that shit BUT, he is some footballer this lad.

If he did happen to make it, having the young star of the Emirates starring for City would be the biggest deal we have ever done.

[Sideshow Bob]

I would have thought that a player being attacked by a Martian would have caused more of a stir.


Little snippet there:

Manchester City are still chasing Al-Ain midfielder Omar Abdulrahman, 21, according to the club's academy chief Brian Marwood.

I really, & I mean REALLY hope this is true.

I have followed this lad since the olympics.

I don't know if he can learn to survive in the mugger's alley of the Prem, or whether he has the workrate or the bottle to get in City's team. That we can only find out over time. What I do know however, is that he has absolute talent bordering on genius & imo COULD become much much better than Silva for example. I haven't seen anything from Neymar which tells me he is automatically a better player than Abdulrahman & the difference in price between each gamble would be astronomical.

His attitude seems perfect from what I have seen, but the Prem is different & only a certain type of person can play in it. He would need to learn which passes he can make without players intercepting, how much stronger & quicker he has to be on the ball, the keepers will save stuff they let in back home, he will have to run twice as much, all that shit BUT, he is some footballer this lad.

If he did happen to make it, having the young star of the Emirates starring for City would be the biggest deal we have ever done.

i agree we should get this kid, and i was surpised when it didn't happen last year. no brainer imo. does sheik mansour have a stake in al-ain?

[DoomMerchant]

Tits are bang on !

Well played. I'm an ass man, yet I'm a fan of those on offer today.

Cheers

[Ted Hughes]

I would have thought that a player being attacked by a Martian would have caused more of a stir.


Little snippet there:

Manchester City are still chasing Al-Ain midfielder Omar Abdulrahman, 21, according to the club's academy chief Brian Marwood.

I really, & I mean REALLY hope this is true.

I have followed this lad since the olympics.

I don't know if he can learn to survive in the mugger's alley of the Prem, or whether he has the workrate or the bottle to get in City's team. That we can only find out over time. What I do know however, is that he has absolute talent bordering on genius & imo COULD become much much better than Silva for example. I haven't seen anything from Neymar which tells me he is automatically a better player than Abdulrahman & the difference in price between each gamble would be astronomical.

His attitude seems perfect from what I have seen, but the Prem is different & only a certain type of person can play in it. He would need to learn which passes he can make without players intercepting, how much stronger & quicker he has to be on the ball, the keepers will save stuff they let in back home, he will have to run twice as much, all that shit BUT, he is some footballer this lad.

If he did happen to make it, having the young star of the Emirates starring for City would be the biggest deal we have ever done.

i agree we should get this kid, and i was surpised when it didn't happen last year. no brainer imo. does sheik mansour have a stake in al-ain?

Dunno but it does sound like we are in the driving seat & it's all set up. It was down to work permit issues that he didn't sign.

Found this very recent quote from 'The National' .

He trained with City in the summer and might already be on a contract with Sheikh Mansour bin Zayed's Premier League champions had he been able to secure a work permit; Britain requires non-EU footballers to have played in 75 per cent of his nation's matches in the previous two years, and his team must be ranked in Fifa's top 70.

The man called "Amoory" falls short on both counts; he missed much of 2011 with a knee injury, and the UAE are ranked No 99.

"I enjoyed training with them, and all went well; the club offered me a four-year contract and they believed in me," he said.

"Roberto Mancini is one of the best managers in the world and it makes me very proud that he thought I was capable to play in his team.

"I did not reject the offer; I could not sign it because the guidelines in England did not allow me to."

If City come calling again and the UAE are in the top 70, would he join them? "Yes, I would," he said. "I wanted to join Man City when they offered me, but it's out of my hands and we cannot do anything.

"If the club offers me again when UAE is in the top 70 of Fifa rankings, I will sign it. It is every player's dream to play in a major European league and Manchester City is one of the biggest clubs."

Surely he would qualify under the 'special talent' thingy now as he's been starring at all levels ? If he was a rag, he would already be playing for them.

[Sideshow Bob]

good find. from what i'd read previously, i was so sure we'd been snubbed by the player himself. we can never quite manage that "special talent" exception, can we? i recall we were also cockblocked on that big unit from israel.

[DoomMerchant]

If he was a rag, he would already be playing for them.

Agreed. Emotionally it seems that way to me as well.

Is there evidence of a player signing for the rags when his country is outside the top 70? I know they get the "not in the side but country in top nn" pass but im struggling to think of them signing a player from a team this low in the FIFA rankings.

[Scatman]

If he was a rag, he would already be playing for them.

Agreed. Emotionally it seems that way to me as well.

Is there evidence of a player signing for the rags when his country is outside the top 70? I know they get the "not in the side but country in top nn" pass but im struggling to think of them signing a player from a team this low in the FIFA rankings.

Fangzou Zong, China, signed January 2004, ranking 85.
Manucho, Angola, signed December 2007, ranking 73.

[Ted Hughes]

If he was a rag, he would already be playing for them.

Agreed. Emotionally it seems that way to me as well.

Is there evidence of a player signing for the rags when his country is outside the top 70? I know they get the "not in the side but country in top nn" pass but im struggling to think of them signing a player from a team this low in the FIFA rankings.

Fangzou Zong, China, signed January 2004, ranking 85.
Manucho, Angola, signed December 2007, ranking 73.

Not only that but they have signed players who have barely, if at all, represented their international teams, the latest being a Chilean cf who they signed & immediately loaned out to Wigan.

Even these characters like Rafael have made barely any international appearences & the few he has made happened last season.

They just seem to be able to sign as many as they want outside the criteria.

[carl_feedthegoat]

I would have thought that a player being attacked by a Martian would have caused more of a stir.


Little snippet there:

Manchester City are still chasing Al-Ain midfielder Omar Abdulrahman, 21, according to the club's academy chief Brian Marwood.

I really, & I mean REALLY hope this is true.

I have followed this lad since the olympics.

I don't know if he can learn to survive in the mugger's alley of the Prem, or whether he has the workrate or the bottle to get in City's team. That we can only find out over time. What I do know however, is that he has absolute talent bordering on genius & imo COULD become much much better than Silva for example. I haven't seen anything from Neymar which tells me he is automatically a better player than Abdulrahman & the difference in price between each gamble would be astronomical.

His attitude seems perfect from what I have seen, but the Prem is different & only a certain type of person can play in it. He would need to learn which passes he can make without players intercepting, how much stronger & quicker he has to be on the ball, the keepers will save stuff they let in back home, he will have to run twice as much, all that shit BUT, he is some footballer this lad.

If he did happen to make it, having the young star of the Emirates starring for City would be the biggest deal we have ever done.

i agree we should get this kid, and i was surpised when it didn't happen last year. no brainer imo. does sheik mansour have a stake in al-ain?

Dunno but it does sound like we are in the driving seat & it's all set up. It was down to work permit issues that he didn't sign.

Found this very recent quote from 'The National' .

He trained with City in the summer and might already be on a contract with Sheikh Mansour bin Zayed's Premier League champions had he been able to secure a work permit; Britain requires non-EU footballers to have played in 75 per cent of his nation's matches in the previous two years, and his team must be ranked in Fifa's top 70.

The man called "Amoory" falls short on both counts; he missed much of 2011 with a knee injury, and the UAE are ranked No 99.

"I enjoyed training with them, and all went well; the club offered me a four-year contract and they believed in me," he said.

"Roberto Mancini is one of the best managers in the world and it makes me very proud that he thought I was capable to play in his team.

"I did not reject the offer; I could not sign it because the guidelines in England did not allow me to."

If City come calling again and the UAE are in the top 70, would he join them? "Yes, I would," he said. "I wanted to join Man City when they offered me, but it's out of my hands and we cannot do anything.

"If the club offers me again when UAE is in the top 70 of Fifa rankings, I will sign it. It is every player's dream to play in a major European league and Manchester City is one of the biggest clubs."

Surely he would qualify under the 'special talent' thingy now as he's been starring at all levels ? If he was a rag, he would already be playing for them.

Cannot secure a work permit for a guy that will be paying his dues and not claiming money from the state yet we allow spongers in by the fucking thousands.

Britain - a laugh a minute.

[Florida Blue]

If he was a rag, he would already be playing for them.

Agreed. Emotionally it seems that way to me as well.

Is there evidence of a player signing for the rags when his country is outside the top 70? I know they get the "not in the side but country in top nn" pass but im struggling to think of them signing a player from a team this low in the FIFA rankings.

Fangzou Zong, China, signed January 2004, ranking 85.
Manucho, Angola, signed December 2007, ranking 73.

Not only that but they have signed players who have barely, if at all, represented their international teams, the latest being a Chilean cf who they signed & immediately loaned out to Wigan.

[highlight]Even these characters like Rafael have made barely any international appearences[/highlight]& the few he has made happened last season.

They just seem to be able to sign as many as they want outside the criteria.

Do U-21, U-17, etc caps count in this equation?

[Bianchi on Ice]

So Nasris agent says his "value has not vanished"
Youre not the one playing like your fresh out of league two pal.
Sorry, thats harsh...league one

[Ted Hughes]

If he was a rag, he would already be playing for them.

Agreed. Emotionally it seems that way to me as well.

Is there evidence of a player signing for the rags when his country is outside the top 70? I know they get the "not in the side but country in top nn" pass but im struggling to think of them signing a player from a team this low in the FIFA rankings.

Fangzou Zong, China, signed January 2004, ranking 85.
Manucho, Angola, signed December 2007, ranking 73.

Not only that but they have signed players who have barely, if at all, represented their international teams, the latest being a Chilean cf who they signed & immediately loaned out to Wigan.

[highlight]Even these characters like Rafael have made barely any international appearences[/highlight]& the few he has made happened last season.

They just seem to be able to sign as many as they want outside the criteria.

Do U-21, U-17, etc caps count in this equation?

Don't think so, & Raphael for instance hadn't played that many of of those either, until he signed for the rags & played a few.

The Chilean lad played plenty tbf ( but the rags recently blocked him from going to play for his country's U20's in a tournament, so he could sit on the bench at Wigan instead).

[Piccsnumberoneblue]

Tits are bang on !

Well played. I'm an ass man, yet I'm a fan of those on offer today.

Cheers

Worst wag for some time. She looks rough as the roads. D-