Friday's B*l**x (updated)

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Friday's B*l**x (updated)

Postby Chinners » Fri Mar 21, 2014 8:50 am

THE BOLLOX

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Luis Suarez ‘targeted for sensational summer swoop by Manchester City’
Manchester City are said to be targeting a sensational summer move for Liverpool’s Luis Suarez, according to reports in Spain.
Spanish newspaper Marca believe City have made the Uruguayan international their top target for this summer’s transfer window, despite him having just signed a new deal to keep him at Anfield until 2018.
Suarez became the highest paid player in Liverpool history when he put pen to paper just before Christmas, but that hasn’t stopped the rumours of a summer move.
Arsenal and Real Madrid were both keen on the 27-year-old last year, but according to Marca it’s Man City who could be making a mega-bucks offer for Suarez this time around.
The newspaper reports City’s director of football Txiki Begiristain has already held initial talks with the striker, but it would take a huge offer – likely upwards of £70m – to convince Liverpool to sell their prize asset, especially with Champions League football on the horizon.
Suarez has netted 25 goals for the Reds already this term and is among the leading candidates to be named PFA Player of the Year.

Manchester City striker Alvaro Negredo has been voted 'signing of the season' .
The Spain international, who has scored 23 goals in all competitions since moving from Sevilla last summer, was voted the division's best signing of 2013-14 by 59% of top-flight bosses.
All 20 Premier League managers voted as part of a survey by the Barclays 'Thank you' campaign, with Liverpool striker Luis Suarez chosen as the player of the season so far and Arsenal midfielder Aaron Ramsey thought of as the best youngster.
The managers also recognised the achievements of three of their peers, with Crystal Palace's Tony Pulis, Manchester City's Manuel Pellegrini and Southampton's Mauricio Pochettino chosen for having done the most impressive work this season.
Pulis has guided struggling Palace out of the bottom three since taking over in November, while Pellegrini has made Manchester City the Sky Bet favourites for the title and Pochettino has made the Saints outsiders for a Europa League place.
Managers were also asked which Premier League stadium had the best atmosphere, with 40 choosing Anfield over the likes of Old Trafford, White Hart Lane or the Emirates.
Manchester United fans are considered to give the best away support, followed by Liverpool and Aston Villa, and England in general is considered by 41% of managers to have the most avid supporters in the world.
The study also found that 80% of managers attended their first ever game as a fan before the age of nine, with over half of them going to a match before they were five, suggesting that watching football from a young age leads to a greater understanding of the game.

Manchester City Weigh Up Robin Van Persie Move Should He Decide To Leave Manchester United
Manchester City are said to be weighing up a move for Manchester United striker Robin Van Persie if he decides to push through a move away from Old Trafford this summer, according to Football Direct News.
The Blues made an unsuccessful approach for the 30-year-old after winning the Premier League title in 2012, only to see him leave Arsenal for the Red Devils instead.
And after firing United to the title last season he has undergone a significantly more frustrating campaign this season with injuries and rumours of a split with manager David Moyes casting doubt over his future at the club.
The rumoured row with Moyes was played down by the club, but question marks still remain as to whether he will still be there next season.
The player’s only realistic chance of playing Champions League football with United next season is if they lift the European Cup in May, as they are way off the pace in their pursuit of a top-four finish.
But City will be guaranteed a spot at the top table as they continue to chase the Premier League title.
United may not want to sell to a rival, though, but a big enough offer could tempt the Scot to part with the Dutchman as he looks to remodel his squad this summer.

La Gazzetta dello Sport reports that Roma's primary transfer objective is Manchester City forward Stevan Jovetic.
The paper believes that Roma president James Pallotta is due to arrive in Italy from the USA in the next few days and will set his transfer targets for the summer.
It is suggested that Roma will set aside some of the money they will receive for Champions League qualification to chase Jovetic's signature.
The 24-year-old hasn't had the brightest of spells at Manchester City since signing from Fiorentina last summer.
The main problem for the Montenegro international has been injuries and he has only been able to make 12 appearances all season.
There have been rumours that Jovetic has fallen out with manager Manuel Pellegrini, but the player spoke out in the Manchester Evening News earlier this week to stress that his boss has faith in him.
Jovetic shares an agent with Adem Ljajic, so Roma may have a head-start in negotiations and Francesco Totti is a known admirer of his.

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Tottenham ponder move for City flop
Tottenham Hotspur could be interested in signing Manchester City midfielder Jack Rodwell this summer, according to Fichajes.net.
The 23-year-old was once regarded as one of the most promising young players in the English game during his time at Everton, but injuries have held him back and he has struggled to make an impact since joining City last season.
Rodwell has made just 23 appearances for the club since joining, and only 7 in all competitions this season as he faces plenty of competition for places at the Etihad Stadium.
The England international has been linked with several clubs in recent times, with a return to Everton being suggested, as well as a loan move to Championship side Wigan Athletic.
However, Tottenham are keen on rebuilding their squad this summer, and manager Tim Sherwood is a fan of Rodwell, and his injury record could mean he is available on the cheap.
With the likes of Sandro and Etienne Capoue rumoured to be on the way out of White Hart Lane this summer, a new signing in midfield could be a priority for the north London club.

YaYa's Girlfriend in her undies!!
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Ex-Man United and Man City man Tevez stamps on keeper's head
The tempestuous Argentine forward left the boot in during Juventus’ Europa League tie with Fiorentina.
An Andrea Pirlo free-kick ensured that Juventus overcame Italian counterparts Fiorentina in the Europa League on Thursday night, with the Serie A champions prevailing 1-0 at the Stadio Artemio Franchi in the second leg.
However, in the last minute of the game with Antonio Conte’s men looking to hold onto their victory, Carlos Tevez came up with this moment of madness.
It is clear that there is no love lost between Argentina and Brazil, with Tevez leaving his boot in a challenge that catches Viola stopper Neto on the head.
Despite rumbustious remonstrations by the home side’s players, referee Howard Webb opted only to book the former Manchester United and City striker.
Tevez’s career has not been short of controversy, with his time in England plagued with dramas.
Despite being the top goalscorer in Serie A this season, Carlitos will not be heading to the World Cup this summer after falling out with Argentina coach Alejandro Sabella.
[youtube]b9vPkNLVfFU[/youtube]

GOLDEN BOLLOX 21-3-2010
Neymar Bollox
The 18-year-old forward has been linked with a move to Manchester City over the last few months in a deal which was believed to have been discussed when Robinho joined Santos on loan in January.
Manchester City reportedly secured first option on Neymar when Robinho joined his former club but the deal is now in jeopardy as Santos cannot finalise sponsorship deals worth £375,000-a-month.
Chelsea are now ready to step in and secure Neymar for £30million in the summer when a bidding war is expected for one of the hottest talents in Brazil.
[youtube]1j9YslOg1fs[/youtube]

Jose asked to name his price
MANCHESTER City will ask Jose Mourinho to name his price in the summer in a bid to tempt him back into English football.
City are aware that even though Mourinho guided Inter Milan into the Champions League quarter-finals at the expense of Chelsea in midweek, he is not happy in Italian football.
Ambitious City are backed by Sheikh Mansour’s billions – and he will not flinch at increasing Mourinho’s current pay packet of £8.3million a year – £160,000 a week.
The Inter boss has a £5.5m buy-out clause but that presents no problem for the richest club in the world, who are determined to win the major trophies. And, in an amazing twist, Roberto Mancini could end up back at Inter Milan.
When he replaced Mark Hughes as City boss, Mancini was told that his position would be reviewed in the summer. He is still on friendly terms with Inter president Massimo Moratti despite being shown the door to allow Mourinho to be appointed.
City’s big worry as they seek the manager they regard as the best in the business is that Real Madrid are also in the market for a top boss in the summer after deciding to ditch Manuel Pellegrini.
If Mourinho doesn’t end up in Madrid then City believe they could well land their man.

Juventus line up shock move for Mancini - Exclusive
Roberto Mancini has emerged as a ­front-runner to become coach of Juventus.
The biggest club in Italy are reeling following their shock Europa Cup exit at Fulham.
And Mancini, who was in the crowd at Craven Cottage, is seen as the perfect man to restore the Old Lady to her former glory after leading Inter to three successive Serie A titles.
Fiorentina coach Cesare Prandelli is the favourite to replace Alberto Zaccheroni, who has been in charge for less than two months. But the ­Italian FA want ­Prandelli to take over from Marcello Lippi after the World Cup.


Chelsea's Fernando Torres, 30, has been linked with a return to former club Atletico Madrid in a swap deal involving fellow forward Diego Costa, 25. Daily Mirror

Benfica boss Jorge Jesus has confirmed Liverpool's interest in £25m-rated striker Rodrigo, 23. DSSC

Inter Milan are favourites to sign Portuguese midfielder William Carvalho, 21, unless Liverpool or Manchester United can get in first. Talkshit

The agent of Bayern Munich's Mario Mandzukic, 27, has flown into London for talks with Arsenal and Chelsea about the Croatian striker. Inside Futbol

Liverpool manager Brendan Rodgers is keen to reward left-back Jon Flanagan, 21, with a new contract. Guardian

Newcastle boss Alan Pardew, 52, has revealed he is making plans to overhaul his squad in the summer. Daily Express

Tottenham legend Glenn Hoddle, 56, a former Spurs player and manager, believes the club has squandered the £86.9m they received from Real Madrid for Gareth Bale, 24. DSSC

Tottenham manager Tim Sherwood has hit back at disparaging comments made by the club's former striker Gary Lineker about current front man Roberto Soldado, 28. Sun

Chelsea have opened contract talks with defender John Terry. The Blues' captain, 33, is out of contract in the summer but wants more than a one-year extension. Daily Telegraph

Prime Minister David Cameron and US president Barack Obama have been urged to take financial action against Chelsea owner Roman Abramovich, 47, for his close links with Russian president Vladimir Putin following the annexation of Crimea. Daily Telegraph

Wayne Rooney, 28, has revealed Manchester United players held crisis talks before their Champions League match with Olympiakos in the wake of their 3-0 home defeat by Liverpool. Daily Mirror

Losing Arsene Wenger as manager will be a "nightmare" according the former Arsenal chairman Peter Hill-Wood. Wenger takes charge of his 1,000th game when his side face Chelsea on Saturday. Daily Star

Liverpool's Joe Allen, 24, is becoming one of the Premier League's top midfielders, says Anfield boss Brendan Rodgers. Liverpool Echo

Southampton midfielder Morgan Schneiderlin, 24, has told French media that one day he would like to play for a "great club". Southampton Echo

Real Madrid forward Gareth Bale, 24, has revealed he expects Manchester City to win the Premier League title, he feels no pressure over his £86.9m price tag and that he is hopeful Wales can reach a major tournament. Sun

West Brom's Spanish manager Pepe Mel, 51, has revealed that assistants Keith Downing and Dean Kiely give the half-time team talk because his English is not good enough. DSSC

Former Everton midfielder Kevin Kilbane, 37, has revealed how manager David Moyes, now at Manchester United, gave him crucial support when his daughter was born with Down's Syndrome. Daily Telegraph

Today is the chumps league quarterfinal draw. We here at Bollox Towers predict the following ....
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more bollox later ...
Last edited by Chinners on Fri Mar 21, 2014 10:43 am, edited 5 times in total.
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Re: Friday's B*l**x

Postby Ted Hughes » Fri Mar 21, 2014 9:04 am

Cheers Chinners.

Howard fucking Webb. Look at the frown of intent on his face as he searches for Tevez before doing nothing in particular.

Looking at that Tevez incident, the 5th official is stood a few yards away. Not only does he do nothing, offer nothing, but Tevez is so sure he will do nothing, he kicks the keeper on the head right in front of him. In short, these blokes do not fucking exist; the players don't even recognise them being there because they do absolutely fucking nothing. They are paid spectators.

Of all the crap UEFA have come up with, this has to be the stupidest most inept fucking idea even that bunch of corrupt clowns has managed. The people responsible for this ridiculous charade should all be sacked.
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Some take the bible for what it's worth.. when they say that the rags shall inherit the Earth...
Well I heard that the Sheikh... bought Carlos Tevez this week...& you fuckers aint gettin' nothin..
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Re: Friday's B*l**x

Postby Foreverinbluedreams » Fri Mar 21, 2014 9:17 am

How does Tevez get away with just a yellow? Fair enough Webb may not have seen the 'stamp' ( he has form here ) but one of his assistants has obviously informed him that Tevez stamped/kicked so surely the only outcome can be red?
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Re: Friday's B*l**x

Postby Douglas Higginbottom » Fri Mar 21, 2014 9:27 am

Foreverinbluedreams wrote:How does Tevez get away with just a yellow? Fair enough Webb may not have seen the 'stamp' ( he has form here ) but one of his assistants has obviously informed him that Tevez stamped/kicked so surely the only outcome can be red?


I remember that he saw the Mario incident against Spurs but bottled it and then (imo) lied afterwards so that Mario got a ban.Webb is supposed to be our best ref but that's just another joke.
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Re: Friday's B*l**x

Postby Foreverinbluedreams » Fri Mar 21, 2014 9:34 am

Douglas Higginbottom wrote:
Foreverinbluedreams wrote:How does Tevez get away with just a yellow? Fair enough Webb may not have seen the 'stamp' ( he has form here ) but one of his assistants has obviously informed him that Tevez stamped/kicked so surely the only outcome can be red?


I remember that he saw the Mario incident against Spurs but bottled it and then (imo) lied afterwards so that Mario got a ban.Webb is supposed to be our best ref but that's just another joke.


I agree about Webb lying on that occasion, he clearly saw the incident and bottled it like you suggest. I watched this game yesterday and he was poor throughout, he let Vidal away with kicking anything that moved all game.
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Re: Friday's B*l**x

Postby Ted Hughes » Fri Mar 21, 2014 9:42 am

Foreverinbluedreams wrote:
Douglas Higginbottom wrote:
Foreverinbluedreams wrote:How does Tevez get away with just a yellow? Fair enough Webb may not have seen the 'stamp' ( he has form here ) but one of his assistants has obviously informed him that Tevez stamped/kicked so surely the only outcome can be red?


I remember that he saw the Mario incident against Spurs but bottled it and then (imo) lied afterwards so that Mario got a ban.Webb is supposed to be our best ref but that's just another joke.


I agree about Webb lying on that occasion, he clearly saw the incident and bottled it like you suggest. I watched this game yesterday and he was poor throughout, he let Vidal away with kicking anything that moved all game.


I wonder if he even asked the 5th ref if he had seen anything. The bloke never even moved, reacted nor indicated anything when the incident happened.
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VIVA EL CITY !!!

Some take the bible for what it's worth.. when they say that the rags shall inherit the Earth...
Well I heard that the Sheikh... bought Carlos Tevez this week...& you fuckers aint gettin' nothin..
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Re: Friday's B*l**x

Postby Douglas Higginbottom » Fri Mar 21, 2014 9:47 am

Ted Hughes wrote:
Foreverinbluedreams wrote:
Douglas Higginbottom wrote:
Foreverinbluedreams wrote:How does Tevez get away with just a yellow? Fair enough Webb may not have seen the 'stamp' ( he has form here ) but one of his assistants has obviously informed him that Tevez stamped/kicked so surely the only outcome can be red?


I remember that he saw the Mario incident against Spurs but bottled it and then (imo) lied afterwards so that Mario got a ban.Webb is supposed to be our best ref but that's just another joke.


I agree about Webb lying on that occasion, he clearly saw the incident and bottled it like you suggest. I watched this game yesterday and he was poor throughout, he let Vidal away with kicking anything that moved all game.


I wonder if he even asked the 5th ref if he had seen anything. The bloke never even moved, reacted nor indicated anything when the incident happened.


He probably knows they are a waste of time as well so didn't bother.I think Webb believes in his own hype that he is a top ref.Deluded.
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Re: Friday's B*l**x (updated)

Postby Foreverinbluedreams » Fri Mar 21, 2014 9:48 am

He definitely consulted with someone Ted, not sure who.
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Re: Friday's B*l**x (updated)

Postby Ted Hughes » Fri Mar 21, 2014 9:54 am

Foreverinbluedreams wrote:He definitely consulted with someone Ted, not sure who.


Well if he asked the 5th official, who was stood 10 yards away, what could his answer possibly be other than 'nailed on red card' ?

If you or I stood ten yards away from that incident, we would have no option but to describe what we had seen, which would be Tevez deliberately giving the bloke a bang on the head. Then Webb has no option but to send him off.

If the 5th official hasn't seen it, then that is even worse!

I bet he asked the lino!
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Re: Friday's B*l**x (updated)

Postby Chinners » Fri Mar 21, 2014 11:17 am

As you would expext from BOLLOX Towers ... got them ALL wrong!

Champions League QF Draw:
Barcelona v Atletico Madrid
Real Madrid v Dortmund
PSG v Chelsea
Manchester United v Bayern Munich
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Re: Friday's B*l**x (updated)

Postby dick dastardley » Fri Mar 21, 2014 11:20 am

raggies season started and ended all within a week lol
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Re: Friday's B*l**x (updated)

Postby Clowncrete » Fri Mar 21, 2014 11:24 am

So, when is the first leg of the massacre?
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Re: Friday's B*l**x (updated)

Postby Hutch's Shoulder » Fri Mar 21, 2014 11:26 am

Clowncrete wrote:So, when is the first leg of the massacre?


Ties are to be played 1-2 April and 8-9 April.
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Re: Friday's B*l**x (updated)

Postby zuricity » Fri Mar 21, 2014 11:49 am

Think i might just pop over to München for the "Comedy of Errors" , i never know when i might get to see the latter day Duncan Edwards play in the CL again.
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Re: Friday's B*l**x (updated)

Postby Cit.revenge » Fri Mar 21, 2014 12:09 pm

Tell me this is a joke about Van pussy !
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Re: Friday's B*l**x (updated)

Postby Foreverinbluedreams » Fri Mar 21, 2014 12:43 pm

Cit.revenge wrote:Tell me this is a joke about Van pussy !


This is a joke about Van pussy !
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Re: Friday's B*l**x (updated)

Postby Goaters 103 » Fri Mar 21, 2014 1:03 pm

Perfect draw by Mr Figo, most excellent work.

I wouldn't fancy Utd against Bayern if they had 2 home legs.
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Re: Friday's B*l**x

Postby sweenyuk » Fri Mar 21, 2014 1:08 pm

Ted Hughes wrote:Cheers Chinners.

Howard fucking Webb. Look at the frown of intent on his face as he searches for Tevez before doing nothing in particular.

Looking at that Tevez incident, the 5th official is stood a few yards away. Not only does he do nothing, offer nothing, but Tevez is so sure he will do nothing, he kicks the keeper on the head right in front of him. In short, these blokes do not fucking exist; the players don't even recognise them being there because they do absolutely fucking nothing. They are paid spectators.

Of all the crap UEFA have come up with, this has to be the stupidest most inept fucking idea even that bunch of corrupt clowns has managed. The people responsible for this ridiculous charade should all be sacked.

These extra refs really should have worked, but they seem to do nothing. Are they there to ref the game or to just judge if a ball has crossed a line..?? as they don't seem to have any input currently.
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Re: Friday's B*l**x (updated)

Postby sheblue » Fri Mar 21, 2014 1:34 pm

Goaters 103 wrote:Perfect draw by Mr Figo, most excellent work.

I wouldn't fancy Utd against Bayern if they had 2 home legs.


Bayern will murder them.
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Re: Friday's B*l**x (updated)

Postby BlueinBosnia » Fri Mar 21, 2014 3:48 pm

Chinners wrote:Manchester City striker Alvaro Negredo has been voted 'signing of the season' .
The Spain international, who has scored 23 goals in all competitions since moving from Sevilla last summer, was voted the division's best signing of 2013-14 by 59% of top-flight bosses.
All 20 Premier League managers voted as part of a survey by the Barclays 'Thank you' campaign...

Erm... How did they get 59% of 20?
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